Lions 1 Christians 0
Imagine it.
It's Sunday evening in Kiev and you decide to take your kids to the zoo to go see all the animals.
It's packed out and your kids are having a great time, so when your little one grabs your sleeve, tugs on it and says "mommy can we go see the lions?", you smile and direct your children to the lion enclosure which is almost like an "animal island" and is protected by thick concrete blocks.
You "oooh" and "aaaaah" at the lions when suddenly, a man rushes past you, climbs into the animal's enclosure and shouts "God will save me, if he exists!!!" as he lowers himself by rope into said enclosure.
In stunned disbelief you watch as he takes off his shoes and walks towards the lions. Fearless. Crazy...
As a lioness runs at him, knocks him down, severs his carotid artery.... in fact, as she mauls this crazy religious man to death, your little one grabs your sleeve and tugs on it again and says "but Santa Claus is still real. Right?"
Posted By: Lint | 12:11 PM | Lint
Comments
There is a Santa, and God just wanted to have a face to face with that man, that's all.
Posted by: TheMAdAdmin | June 6, 2006 06:36 PM
And this guy probably got up to the pearly gates and St. Peter was standing there, arms crossed, ironic smile on his face, shaking his head.
"Dude, you're a moron," he'll say to this moron. "There's nothing God hates more than an overzealous fool."
heh.
Posted by: Viki | June 7, 2006 01:00 PM
Ah hahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
It's all about the faith, baby...
Posted by: Deb | June 7, 2006 03:12 PM
This man must not have been a true follower of my Lord and Savior, Jesus "Lion Stopper" Christ.
Posted by: Herman B. Hayes | June 8, 2006 06:13 AM
Actually, it's Christians 0, Lions 2. See: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/6396422/
And in this case, I think you need to have Christian in quotes as no kind of orthodox Christian would actually think this way...
Posted by: matt | June 8, 2006 07:17 AM
lol Herman you've made JC sound like a pro wrestler!
Matt, you are correct with the 2 lions count, however I will not be putting quote marks around the word Christian as no one really takes me seriously anyway.
Posted by: Deb | June 8, 2006 01:06 PM
You'd have to have a pretty wonky sense of faith to figure jumping into a lion enclosure is going to prove anything at all - Perhaps the man was a converted Scientologist.
Posted by: Canadian Mark | June 8, 2006 01:33 PM
Heh, fair enough.
Posted by: matt | June 9, 2006 01:09 AM
Ha ha! I've seen this story many times over the net but your version was the only one that made me laugh :)
Posted by: Carrie | June 9, 2006 11:22 AM