Dumbass Snobs and What They're Drinking Now
What do these three pictures have in common?
Give up?
The answer is: everything!!
Avid coffee drinkers are willing to pay $175 for a pound of coffee beans that have passed through the digestive tract and anus of the Indonesian Palm Civet (that's the cute furry thing on the left) and the coffee is getting rave reviews from coffee lovers.
Even though Civets are primarily carnivorous, they do like to treat themselves to ripe coffee cherries. The coffee beans found inside the cherries pass through the Civet's digestive tract and remain intact. Civet shit can be found near coffee plantations on the forest floor and once they're carefully cleaned and roasted, the coffee beans can then be sold to specialty buyers and it is sold as Kopi Luwak (which I think roughly translates to "Beans to Sell to Naive Coffee Drinkers Ha Ha Did We Sure Pull One Over On Those Stupid Westerners", I could be wrong).
Apparently these coffee beans that have been encased in mammal shit make for a unique taste and flavour and due to the process in which they're acquired and the fact that Indonesia only produces roughly 1,100 pounds of the coffee each year, it's being touted as being very rare, and therefore, very expensive.
This coffee has only been available to the US and European markets since February 2005 and while it started off slow, sales rose three fold just before Christmas with orders coming in from North America (mostly California) and Europe.
I can't believe that people are drinking coffee that has come from a furry forest creature’s ass, and I wonder if it's the caffeine, the price, or the knowledge that they know the origins of the coffee bean, that keeps the drinker up late at night.
Just goes to show if you market something well enough and stick a huge price tag on it; some stupid people will buy anything.
Just a quick heads up, don't ever put furry ass or animal ass into the Google search engine when looking for images. It is not pretty.
Posted By: Lint | 06:25 AM | Lint
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Comments
"beans that have been encased in mammal shit make for a unique taste and flavour" I bet they fukcen do! Rich people are so funny sometimes.
Check out this video of rich people tasting water, summs it up really, but CAUTION watch out for pop-ups / unders / intos / outofs and other such siht.
PS. when I preview my post, I see it above, but have to copy-paste / re-type it. Might just be me tho.
Posted by: the new normal | January 2, 2006 11:55 AM
I wonder if that coffee is fair trade approved? I also wonder if the coffee pickers who've been assigned the job of picking civet-shit covered coffee berries off the ground are getting paid a bonus for the privilege. I'm also wondering who the HELL thought this shit up?
My guess is the coffee berry pickers, bored out of their minds one day while relentlessly and monotonously picking berries, saw the intact berries in the civet shit on the ground and started throwing them in with the rest of them as a joke, and then someone caught them doing it and made them pick a whole bunch of shit-covered berries, roasted them, and made them drink coffee from them as punishment. Then the coffe berry pickers, as revenge, said, "Hey, this shit tastes pretty fucking good!" and the plantation boss said, "Hey, let's sell if for a ridiculous amount of money! Rich people are stupid! They'll buy it!"
Posted by: Viki | January 2, 2006 03:12 PM
That sounds so plausible that I'm betting that's EXACTLY how it happened!
"Hey, this shit tastes pretty fucking good!"
Outstanding punmanship.
Posted by: Deb | January 2, 2006 04:45 PM
How much does a civet cost? Feed 'em the berries yourself and save!
Posted by: Squid | January 2, 2006 04:54 PM
Fuck the beans, I want to know what the boiled civet shit tastes like. I mean hell if it makes coffe taste better it must be heaven on earth.
Posted by: DaveC | January 2, 2006 04:57 PM
Eeek, ack and ewwwwwwwwwww!
Posted by: Deb | January 3, 2006 12:16 AM
You have GOT to be kidding me. Please, tell me you are making all of this up?
Ack. I, for one, would like to thank you for the heads up because I am a coffee drinker and will be extra cautious from now on . . . and I must make sure to avoid anything resembling Kopi Luwak on the menu . . .
Posted by: Nichole | January 3, 2006 02:06 AM
I wished that I had a furry ass earlier when we went outside, I hate the cold winter.
Butt, after I read this... and of course looked up furry ass in Google (as you know I would) I regret that earlier wish.
Probably I will have nightmares now, about furry asses chasing me to make me drink coffee!
Posted by: Mrs Lifecruiser | January 3, 2006 07:25 PM
Boy am I glad I don't drink coffee.
Posted by: Crazy Like A Fox | January 3, 2006 08:13 PM
I found some peanuts and corn in my shit that I'd like to give you all dibs on. First pound is only $500. I bet there are thousands of those little fuckers shitting out coffee beans. Theres only one DarkSideOfDave!!!!
Posted by: DSOD | January 3, 2006 09:28 PM
I am glad that I missed my morning coffee now. LOL
BA~~93
Posted by: skittles | January 4, 2006 08:56 PM
"I found some peanuts and corn in my shit that I'd like to give you all dibs on. First pound is only $500."
Very funny DSOD!!
I'll definitely stick to Dunkin Donuts.
Posted by: Rain | January 5, 2006 04:17 AM
Deb, your dad was a cop for over 30 years? Wow. I hope I last that long. :-) So, you never thought about being a cop? You know, follow in dad's footsteps??
Posted by: Rain | January 5, 2006 05:20 AM
Yup he surely was and I did go to follow in his footsteps.
Motherhood stepped in first.
Posted by: Deb | January 5, 2006 10:29 AM
LOL! Rich people are stupid, and the sad thing is, the poor bastard who had to carefully remove the coffee from the shit, probably is being paid like $2 a day for it.
Posted by: Benjamin Solah | January 6, 2006 10:22 AM
LMAO! Now I have heard it all. I am a coffee snob (my hubbie tells me so), but NO THANKS to the shitty coffee beans. I'm so glad that I didn't read this in the morning.
Posted by: SuZan | January 7, 2006 12:33 AM