The Poo

~I received this in an email, so I can't link the author or give the peson who wrote this credit, as I don't know where it came from originally~.

I wanted to share...

BASIC TYPES OF POO

The Ghost Poo
The kind where you feel poo come out, see poo on the toilet paper, but there's no poo in the bowl.

The Clean poo
The kind where you feel poo come out, see poo in the bowl, but theres no poo on the toilet paper.

The Wet Poo
You wipe your butt fifty times and it still feels unwiped. So yo end up putting toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you don't ruin them with those dreadful skid marks.

The Splash-Back Poo
That's the kind that comes out of your butt so fast that your butt cheeks get splashed with the toilet water.

The Second Wave Poo
This poo happens when you think you've finished, your pants are up to your knees, and you suddenly realize you have to poo some more.

The Brain Haemorrahage-through-your-nose Poo
You have to strain so much to get it out that you turn purple and practically have a stroke.

The Lincoln Log
The kind of poo that's so enormous you're afraid to flush it down without first breaking it up into little pieces with the toilet brush.

The Power Dump Poo
The kind that comes out so fast, you've barely got your pants down and you're done.

The Liquid Plumber Poo
This kind of poo is so big it plugs up the toilet and it overflows all over the floor. You should have followed the advice from the Lincoln Log Poo.

The Spinal Tap Poo
The kind of poo that hurts so much coming out, you'd swear it's got to be coming out sideways.

The 'I-think-I'm-turning-into-a-bunny' Poo
When you drop lots of cute, little round ones that look like marbles and make tiny splishy sounds when they hit the water.

The 'What-the-hell-died-in-here' Poo
Also sometimes referred to as The Toxic Dump. Of course you don't warn anyone of the poisonous bathroom odour. Instead, you stand innocently near the door and enjoy the show as they run out a-gagging and a-gasping for air.

The 'I-just-know-there's-a-turd-still-dangling-there' Poo
Where you just sit there patiently and wait for the last cling-on to drop.

I think we can all raise our hands to having experienced if not all, but most of these in our toilet time.

Posted By: Lint | 08:34 PM | Lint

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